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Codependency
Codependency is a lack of a sense of self and a creative life of your
own.
Codependents comply in order
to please and control in order to make the other person what they
want them to be, so they will fulfil their needs for them, instead
of attempting to fulfil their own. This fails. Compliance is another
form of controlling.
Another word for Codependency is Dependency,
which is a stage of development, of growing
up. Codependency is a regressed position. It is also an addiction
to unhealthy and dysfunctional
relationships; this means ineffective – they don't work.
The function of addictions is to kill pain and fill up emptiness.
They give only temporary relief and cause more pain and emptiness.
Therefore they have to be repeated frequently and in increasing quantities.
The only way to heal the pain of emptiness and loss of self is to
learn new models for relating with yourself
and others and for filling yourself up from your own resources. In
this way you can gain a sense of who you are and live your life creatively.
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Healing Relationships
with
Self and Others |
